Drunk Hippies Walk Into A Bar...

My Guy Falkor

I was out at some joint on Battleground over the weekend and was having a pleasant enough time (although the Reds were getting smoked by the Cleveland Indians - so that sucked) when in walks a couple of hippies. I mean a couple -a guy and a gal. The guy hippie looked like a cross between Bozo the Clown and Gary Busey in Point Break. The gal hippie just looked like a standard middle-aged granola woman - straight brown hair, no make-up, plain brown dress. They quickly informed everyone at the bar they'd been on a bender since Tuesday (this was Sunday afternoon), which seemed odd as Dead and Company (the guy hippie was rocking a Dead and Company tie-dye) were in Dallas that night - nowhere near Greensboro. Anyway, I don't think they were kidding. They managed to get thrown out in about fifteen minutes, which is really hard to do on a random July Sunday afternoon. The woman hippie managed to launch into her life story for no reason. She followed the Dead from 1988 to 1993 religiously. She gave up the Dead lifestyle to have kids. She's disillusioned with her kids. She wants to go back to the Dead lifestyle (I don't know what that could possibly mean 24 years after Jerry Garcia's death). Yes, she was drunk and over-sharing, as drunk hippies are wont to do. Folks became pretty annoyed pretty fast. So this on a bender hippie chick starts to get pretty incredulous as she realizes she might be a little off-putting to the bar patrons. She proceeded to wander from the left side to the right side of the bar, desperately looking for a friendly person who would listen to her blather on about her date's wild shock of blonde hair or whatever. She happened to choose my buddy Vic as that potentially friendly person. It became rapidly apparent to this hippie that Vic would not be her knight in shining armor or even in rusty armor. She said to Vic "What, you won't listen to me either?" Vic innocently said back "What did I do? I just ordered a sandwich for fuck's sake." It was at this time that the bartender asked her and her portly probable lover to scram. They said they were headed to IUD down the road - a place no one ever gets kicked out of - ever. I hope to run into them down the road, obviously.

Like many folks over the weekend, I binge watched season 3 of The Stranger Things. It was good and all, blah, blah, blah. But this kid who plays Mikey Wheeler is so bad - cringe-worthy bad really. I kept hoping they would kill off his character and put everyone out of their misery. Alas, he survived and will be back for season 4. As for my guys Dustin and Steve; they were awesome.

Speaking of The Stranger Things season 3, my favorite scene is where Dustin and his Mormon chick Suzie sing the theme to The Neverending Story. Amazing,,,

I got a text last month from Geilfuss concerning the sad and atrocious story surrounding Kellen Winslow II and his rape convictions. I had heard very few of the details when Geilfuss sent me the text. So I investigated a bit, and read some of the most disgusting stories imaginable. This thing Winslow had with raping 60+ year old women was painful to read. Not the younger victims had it better or anything. Anyway, one of the the details that came to light was his masturbatory history while in the NFL. I mean the guy masturbated constantly in front of anyone for years while in the league. The fact he lasted for so many years and that five teams gave him a chance says it all about the NFL - if you have talent, that trumps everything.

As Jerry Seinfeld said - Not that there's anything wrong with that.


I'm a little rusty here with the blogging, but am gonna try to get back into the swing of it.