Recently there was some incredible news out of one of the socialist countries in Europe (I think the country has something to do with Norwegian Wood by John Lennon, but whatever). A few guys over there decided to give the Nobel "Peace" Prize to my man, Barack Hussein Obama. I'm not sure if he's the first Hawaiian mulatto to get the thing or not. Now, many cruel and insensitive folks are ridiculing the fact that this awesome prize has been bestowed on old Barry. I say, don't be a hater. The man won this prize fair and square. Congratulations Barry! After all, our cool and hip leader has done many things so far worthy of a "Peace" Prize. Let me list just some, because if I tried to list everything, I'd be typing for days and days:
1) Barry went on Letterman a few weeks ago
2) Barry plays golf pretty often
3) Barry gets Joe Biden reduced cost boner medication
4) Barry has an Ivy League education
5) Barry is somewhat literate
6) Barry screwed our allies in Eastern Europe on missile defense
7) Barry is capitulating to every request from Moscow
8) Barry is completely giving in on the Iranian nuclear program
9) Barry is leaving our troops in Afghanistan twisting in the wind by not sending more men to help
10) Barry gave a speech, and another, and another, and another...
There you go! See how Barry does warrant this prestigious "Peace" Prize? And remember this too, he's in very good company as a winner of this deal. Albert Arnold Gore won the thing, and he and his nasty wife Tipper once tried to censor rock lyrics! Jimmy Carter won too, I assume for his great job growing peanuts. Kofi Annan won and he was a crook when he ran the UN. Yasser Arafat also won and he led the PLO for many years and they were largely a terrorist organization. So old Barry is in really good company on this whole thing. Send him an email of congratulations.
I mentioned Letterman earlier, and apparently he has come out and boasted about all these babes he's nailed - which is fine, a bit juvenile to boast about it in public, but whatever. The thing about these countless babes he's been doing is that they worked for him. And that is really creepy. It's not like getting together with a co-worker (which happens all the time). He's the boss of the company. And that is really uncool. I think he's lost touch with reality. I wrote a long piece about Letterman earlier this year (not totally flattering) and I had no idea this was gonna come out. One of these babes he was doing, he was sharing with her husband. I don't pass judgment on how folks wanna get freaky, but that's pretty fucked up. I mean all 3 of them, the babe, the babe's husband, and Letterman - weird freaks. Maybe Sarah Palin isn't so slutty looking after all, huh Dave?
I saw The Office a few weeks ago when Pam and Jim got married by some waterfall. And it was pretty excellent. Anyway, on the episode Dwight becomes a ladies man. He bags one of the bridesmaids and does her hard. Then the next day, he rebuffs the chick and moves on to another lonely wedding goer. It was pretty interesting to say the least. Over the years Dwight has never been portrayed as a guy who gets a lot of tail, much less as a guy who would disrespect a girl the next day (in other words, he hasn't been portrayed as a Geilfuss or, to be fair to Geilfuss, a me in regards to cheap, worthless, pointless sex). I was slightly troubled by this facet of Dwight's personality coming to light. It makes him even more unlikable than ever. Strange.
Also, they have this show on A&E where these people redo parts of your house to get it to sell faster. Anyway, it's silly. But they have this girl on there, and I can never remember her name, but she's something.
When I get to the bottom
I go back to the top of the slide
Where I stop and turn
And I go for a ride
Til I get to the bottom and I see you again
I'm out-
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