Teddy Kennedy Killed A Woman

I ran into Paulie last night for a minute at Get Bent Lounge. I've only seen him like one other time since the AFC Championship Game. Well, the reason I bring it up is that I need to report that Paulie looks as slovenly as ever - like a homeless meth addict.

Big Adam was also out and he was pretty far in the bag by the time Andy and I strolled in about 11:15. And Big Adam and Jason got to talking about running a fantasy football league out of Get Bent Lounge, which, whatever...they might as well because the guys at Get Bent Lounge sit around and have the same stupid sports conversations over and over and over anyway. At least now they can talk about fake fantasy football match-ups. The reason I bring it up is because Big Adam got the idea to get a fantasy draft kit at Hooters. They run commercials mentioning the draft kits continuously it seems like. So, when talk of someone going to Hooters to get the draft kit came up, Big Adam volunteered to do it. The funny part about it is that Big Adam claimed he wouldn't say no to most of the poor stupid girls who work at Hooters. And when Big Adam told me he wouldn't say no to most of the Hooters girls, I asked "What kind of Hooters girl would you say no to?" And he didn't have an answer for that one.

Big Adam also was talking about Felix Pie hitting for the cycle. And I asked him "How long has Felix Pie been having his cycle? I mean since he was 12, 13, or what?" Big Adam said "I can't talk to you about anything. I should know better than to even try." And I said "Yes. You should."

Jess was out last night with me and Andy at Bananbees for the pitiful trivia. Well, she was telling us a story about being at the Super WalMart with her younger brother and her mother. And evidently talk turned to sex at one point, as Jess' younger brother was wanting their mom to buy him some condoms (he's starting college this week evidently). Anyway, their mom refused to get him the condoms. Then on the ride home from the Super WalMart the conversation in the family car was about teens and sexual activity and Jess said she was really uncomfortable hearing her mom and brother talking about sex. Then their mom kind of agreed and said something along the lines of "I don't feel we should be talking about this anymore." And then Jess' little brother dropped this nugget of information, as he said (and Jess had never heard this before), "But Mom, you were the one not too long ago telling me how much you loved Dad's penis." And I asked Jess this when she informed me of this startling and alarming revelation "Did you jump out of the car while it was moving or wait til the next stop light?"

There was a question last night at the trivia about the name of the captain of the Romulan (spelling???) ship in the latest Star Trak film. And I said to Andy "Barack Hussein Obama." He said "Let's go with it." Later a question came up about major peaks and I yelled "Erections!!!" Jess was slightly embarrassed, but then I reminded her that she shouldn't expect good behavior from me. And she agreed with that. The best thing about last night's game was the name we played under. It was: Teddy Kennedy Killed A Woman. The crowd of horrible people in the Bananbees feigned insult the 1st time the guy running the game said the name. When they did this I said to no one and everyone at the same time "It's absolutely true." And it is. In fact, when I heard the news about Teddy K's death, the 1st thought in my mind was: no one should be too upset about it, because at least he lived 40 years and 1 month longer than Mary Jo Kopechne.

There is this show on A&E called Hoarders. And everyone has to watch it. The show focuses on people who have so much crap in their homes that they can't move around. Or so much rotten food in their fridge that the house smells to high hell. And these people are insane. They hoard stuff like food wrappers, newspapers, and even remnants of dumps they've taken. It's fascinating. Me, I'm more the opposite of a hoarder. I'll throw away anything at the slightest whim. It's like what De Niro said in Heat: Never have anything or anyone around that you aren't prepared to walk away from in 30 seconds flat.

Gratitude