Tuesday, February 16, 2021



 The weather experts here in the Capitol City were calling for about a foot of snow overnight. There is about 2 inches on the ground at the moment. So, I turned  on the local NBC affiliate a bit ago to see if their weather wizards would offer some kind of mea culpa. And of course they didn't. They had folks in a panic over the weekend - grocery stores running out of shit, hardware stores selling out ice melt and shovels, etc. Someone texted me yesterday asking if I had everything I needed for the big storm. And I replied truthfully. I texted back - I bought 2 extra packs of smokes. I'm good.

The TV's here at the Old Bag of Dicks in Clintonville are tuned to CNN again today. They have a countdown clock next to the blonde talking head that is counting down to a CNN Town Hall. It's featuring the current occupant of the White House - one Joe Biden. Anyway, I have no idea what the thing will be about - perhaps hair plugs or plagiarism of dead British Prime Ministers. Maybe both. That would seem awkward though. I don't think I've ever watched a town hall before. I don't know why anyone would. 

I was watching the old college hoops on Saturday and I have a new favorite player - Cameron Krutwig from the Ramblers of Loyola Chicago. He was on their team that made the Final Four three years ago. Me and my intern at work bet on them every game in the tournament. They won outright as underdogs in the first four rounds. It was epic. Anyway I was texting with Geilfuss during the game and Geilfuss noted that Krutwig sure looks like a rambler. And I guess that's true. To me he looks like a 22 year old Andy Reid. He can play though. For a big slow white kid he can really ball. 



I was at some joint Sunday afternoon around 4 watching the golf. This kid walks in wearing a Trump cap, MAGA hoodie, and a mask that had two words on it - Fuck Dewine (for those unaware Dewine is the governor of the Buckeye State). This kid said this as he walked past me "Trump 2 Swamp 0." It took me a few seconds to figure out what the kid meant. But then I realized he was referring to Trump's acquittals by the US Senate. He then proceeded to get shit faced while playing pool with a guy I see from time to time around town - a guy I call glasses. I call him glasses because he has the most amazing glasses of any man I've ever met. These huge blue frames and really thick lenses. Anyway, at one point this MAGA loving kid came over to me and asked if I had any quarters on me. And I did. So he gives me a crumpled up single and I hand him the quarters. I then asked if I could take a photo. And he obliged. 



I wished the kid nothing but the best...


Gotta get back to work here.


YOLO.




Thursday, February 11, 2021

Geilfuss is Balding!!!



 I've been working remotely for just over a month now. That, of course, means I've been working from coffee joints and bars with decent WiFi. And  at the bars there are always lots of TV's tuned to silly sports chat shows where grown men scream at each other all day about the most innocuous topics. Things like, is Tom Brady the GOAT of all GOATS? Is Coach K a pedophile? Are the Sixers the favorites in the East? I can't figure out why they scream over these topics. Who watches this? I'm at a loss.

Other TV's at these bars are tuned to CNN or Fox News for some reason. And I've noticed the last few days that there is some big impeachment thing happening in the US Senate. I think they are impeaching the guy who used to be on Celebrity Apprentice. Evidently a group called the Proud Guys rioted  last month because the Celebrity Apprentice guy lost an election. That struck me as odd, as I would think a group called the Proud Guys would be advocates of the old dark anal arts and thus not particularly fans of the Celebrity Apprentice guy. To each his own, I guess.

There's video on CNN right now showing the Proud Guys scrapping with law enforcement last month. They look completely disorganized. What a poorly conceived plan. They had no chance to succeed. Although, come to think of it, I can't figure out what the Proud Guys would have considered a success anyway. Perhaps lynching Nancy Pelosi? What a bunch of fools. They're going to spend decades in jail at best. They could also be hung for treason. Dumb Dumbs.


I did read where our old friend, one Joe Biden of Scranton, PA (shout out to Pam Beasley) and the medically induced boners is now the great leader of the country. I wish him nothing but the best. I did see an article on my Google feed that noted that Joe keeps bowls full of boner medication in the Oval Office. Bowls of them. Big perk for our new hero.

Speaking of the Google feed, it really is terrible. It's supposed to give you stories on things you're interested in, at least I think that's the concept. It fails. I get updates on the Atlanta Hawks, Texas Rangers, Oakland A's, Michigan football and basketball, politics, and random stories on actors I've never heard of. Those are all things I'm not remotely interested in being updated on. It's highly annoying.

I had occasion to catch up with Geilfuss last August. It was a terribly sad occasion, as one of my favorite people on earth passed away -Mama Stills. I went over to Towson to pay respects, and try and console Andy and Mary. Anyway, Geilfuss did the same. And I learned one vital thing as we hung out at what used to the Turquoise Terrapin, that Geilfuss is going bald. Seriously. He was so upset about it that he cried for several hours. Poor kid. He can't catch a break. He finally has a respectable, stable job and poof! he's going bald. 

Andy, Geilfuss, Mark of Jacoby fame, and I did stop in Get Bent Lounge for old time's sake. George wasn't there. That was disappointing, as I wanted to mock him for the first time in 8 and 1/2 years. Anyway, we had two rounds of car bombs and left. I'm told I got back my hotel that night by Creech driving me there. And you know I had to be hammered drunk to allow Creech to drive me anywhere. The kid seemed less sketchy than back 11, 12 years ago. So that's something I guess.

Speaking of the Jacobys,  Mark's twin Luke, took the plunge and got hitched a few months back. And much respect to Luke. He's the only one of the old trivia players who has had the balls to marry. Except Danny - he has the most awesome wife you could ever imagine. The rest of us are still single. Hell, I'm 50 now (that's depressing to type...) and still unmarried. Good luck to Luke. As I've said before, he's one of the best people you will ever meet. He has been calling me periodically during this virus shit to be sure I'm okay. And I'm really trying to hang in there. But I'm lonely as hell. It's tough. I feel like the folks having it real bad (except the folks who have died obviously) are those of us who live alone and can't go into the office to at least have some social interaction. It's terrible. The only people I interact with are drunk barflies around town. Mostly old timers to boot. Did I mention it's terrible?

Speaking of the virus shit, many of the old timer barflies around town insist it's a hoax. That doesn't seem possible, but to each his own. Free speech, blah blah blah. I know several people who have had loved ones die from it. Tell them it's a hoax.

This whole post seems like incoherent rambling, right? Same as ever...

I will try and not go a year and a half between posts again. Of course that's better than a 5 year gap I guess.

Ain't got no weed to roll. Ain't got no Swishers.