Joe Biden Whips It Out

I just checked my mail and in the stupid little box was a circular promoting Robbie Perkins for mayor of Greensboro. On one side of this piece of propaganda is a glossy photo of Mr Perkins, looking very Nixon-esque - all smarmy and crooky. The fake smile on his strange face is hard to look at for more than a few seconds - it's scary & nauseating at the same time. The other side of the little leaflet type mailer has some words written on it. I guess the words are supposed to be reasons to motivate me to get off my ass on Election Day and vote for Mr Perkins. However, the words are not gonna motivate me to do anything on Election Day other than sit around wondering what the hell to watch without the NBA on television (and I was gonna do that anyway...). I'm very concerned about why I received this flyer in the mail. How did the Perkins campaign get my name??? I'm gonna contact them and ask. That's for damn sure. I don't vote. Voting is a useless waste of time. Why would they even bother to send me mail in the 1st place??? This Robbie Perkins guy is pushing it here. Don't send me mail if I don't know you. It's uncool and downright un-American.

The Rhino Times had an issue out recently in which they claimed to have been publishing their little free paper for 20 years. I have no idea if that's true or not. And I don't particularly care either. But one part of this supposed anniversary issue caught my eye. They ran a copy of what they purported to be their 1st issue in 1991. It was like 2 pages long. I read most of it. I really did. And it reminded me of something you'd see being passed out at a rally for retard rights - pointless, poorly written, and insulting. The Rhino has certainly come a long way over 20 years. Now they have like 60 pages in an issue. They run opinion pieces by Scotty Card and Scotty Roast - and those tend to be pointless, poorly written, inane, silly, sophomoric, vapid, and generally unreadably crappy. I do like the news articles in the Rhino. They are actually informative as hell. So there's that. And they do have the NY Times Crossword - I like that too, as it passes the time. Happy Birthday, Rhino!!! Keep up the mediocre work.

Speaking of birthdays, I had one myself the other day. I somehow managed to make it to 41. That's astounding. I can tell I'm getting old because I'm having a harder and harder time seeing things up close. The last time I was at the damn optometrist, my man Dr Cotter informed me I'm gonna need autofocal (that may not be the exact term old Dr Cotter used) lenses soon. Damn aging. It sucks. If I could just run into that chick from Flirting With Disaster somewhere, all this tedious aging shit would be worth it...

Someone left a note on this dumb blog asking me about how things have been going in Durham (I'm working over there, at my real fake job, until Thanksgiving). And I don't have anything new to say about Durham that I haven't said before on this unbelievably stupid blog. Durham is awful. The people smell. The roads suck. Duke is full of pretentious gasbags. And the whole city is a big garbage dump. It's worse than Kabul. Way worse. As far as the work at my real fake job, it's okay. Silly, but okay.

Speaking of people smelling, hippies smell. They really do. Some hippie types have been camping out downtown to protest something (maybe Robbie Perkins). I think they are calling it Occupy Greensboro. I know nothing about these people. But there's one thing I am certain of about this angry mob - they smell. Hippies always smell. They fucking smell. I'm gonna be downtown in about an hour for GamePlan at Stumbles, and I'm gonna walk across W Market St to see these occupiers for myself (if they're still occupying). But I won't be able to stick around long. Because they will smell terrible. They're hippies. Hippies smell. Are you getting my drift???

My man Joe Biden & his massively erect & medically induced boner have been back in the news. Mr Biden was at some function and claimed that if Barry's sad little jobs bill didn't get passed by congress that more women will be raped. And believe it or not, I get Joe's point here. If you think about it, his point makes perfect sense. Here's how - without more wasteful spending endlessly being thrown down the pisser in DC, men will get so angry and sexually frustrated that they'll be compelled to resort to rape to get their fill of the old ripe hole. It stands to reason. I'm with Biden on this one. Well thought out there, Joey B.

I know no shame