Sunday night I wandered into Get Bent Lounge at about a quarter to 8. And Jason's Drunk Roommate was in there - and he was drunk! He told me he had just bought a new razor, a pack of Newports, and 3 Choco Tacos for $10 from some dude on the corner- only he didn't have the pack of Newports with him. So, when he went back to get the pack of Newports, Jason liberated (as I like to put it) his old roommate's (remember, they no longer share a living space) new razor (it was nice, one of those Fusion deals). So, Jason's Drunk Roommate comes back and does have a pack of Newports, but it was a new pack of Newports because the guy who had sold Frank the original pack of Newports, the Fusion razor, and the 3 Choco Tacos was long gone (of course, I did opine aloud about how good a Choco Taco might taste if you bought it on a 90 degree day from some dude on a street corner). So, after Jason's Drunk Roommate bought the new pack of Newports and Jason took the Fusion razor, here's what Jason's Drunk roommate actually got for his $10 investment from the random dude on the corner - 3 semi-melted Choco Tacos; proving the old saying true once again: there's a drunk sucker born every minute. Later, Jason's Drunk Roommate screamed at me about the greatest music lyrics of all time. He named his top 3 in fact. And #1 was some awful lyrics by Blood, Sweat, & Tears - something like: I pray for heaven cause hell smells like my ass. Anyway, I won't bore anyone with the other 2 lyrics he was quoting, except to say one was Van Morrison and the other George Harrison. What's important to pass along is this - Jason's Drunk Roommate wanted to hear the Blood, Sweat, & Tears sing the stupid lyrics he loved so badly that he gave Jason 20 bucks to play it off YouTube. And Jason was more than happy to accede to the request after throwing the twenty into the tip bucket. And as Jason played this awful, awful, song by Blood, Sweat, & Tears (the name of it is: And When I Die) and Jason's Drunk Roommate sang along (poorly) to the ridiculous lyrics and screamed to have the volume cranked way up, George came down toward Jason's Drunk Roommate and said "What the fuck is this guy's problem?" I said "Oh, Frank is just lamenting the fact he paid $10 for 3 soggy Choco Tacos." George said "Oh."
Big Adam was also out Sunday and he was talking about the girl who is suing Ben Roethlisberger for sexual assault and Jason google imaged her and we were kind of talking about how attractive she is. Now, George and Jason seemed to agree that Roethlisberger could do much better, but the girl wasn't too bad. When Fat Adam (as Jess so accurately refers to him) heard this he chimed in "I wouldn't turn her down." I laughed uncontrollably for 5 minutes and Big Adam said "What's so funny?" And I replied "You felt the need to tell us you wouldn't turn her down, that's what is so funny."
Later Big Adam was talking about Erin Andrews and the whole peephole video out there (I haven't seen it). And Big Adam was describing Erin Andrews' body (he claimed that he had seen it). And he said this "She's got a nice ass and nice aveola." And I said "What, pray tell, are "aveola" Adam?" George and Jason were falling over laughing.
Oh, I almost forgot one more thing Jason's Drunk Roommate said that is worth repeating - when he revealed to me the George Harrison song that contains his 3rd favorite lyrics, here's what he called it: While My Guitar Gently Sleeps.
Life Goes On - Ahh!
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