Before I get to the thrust of today's post, it should be noted that on Andy's Faceshit page he put up video of Tyson dancing at Wreck Room recently. And if you're Andy's Faceshit friend, I urge you to check it out. I laughed uncontrollably for the entire minute and a half of the video. At one point Tys pulls a bar stool out, places one leg on top of it, and points down toward his crotch. Hilarious. In the background you can hear Andy laughing his ass off. It reminded me of another night when Tys was in fine form. Tys, Andy, & I were out on the patio at Low Bottoms. Tys was dead drunk. He had his eye on a couple of young ladies. He kept insisting that we buy the girls some shots. I don't recall if we ever did. But I do distinctly recall Tys dancing around like a T-Rex in an attempt to impress the girls. I found it terribly amusing. The girls found it creepy. And poor Andy had to go over and make nice and apologize to the offended girls. I wish Andy had video of Tys doing his T-Rex impression from that night. Because as amazing as the video of Tys dancing at Wreck Room is, video of his T-Rex silliness would be funnier. Plus it would have the bonus of hearing me in the background saying things like, "I think he's morphed into more of a Brontosaurus, Andy." Or, "Take your shirt off Tys. It will be more authentic." Things like that. Good times...
One night last week I was having my normal trouble getting to sleep. I was flipping the old TV remote incessantly as always. And at one point I came across a broadcast of a recent Greensboro City Council meeting. It went on for hours, but was terribly entertaining and enlightening. I learned that the drinking water here causes men to get prostrate cancer. Not prostate cancer - prostrate cancer. A random speaker from the floor shared this nugget of info. And since I'm afraid of anything having to do with my prostrate (whatever that is, maybe something that makes you lie face down???) going haywire, I haven't drank city water since. I've been sticking to 40's. Other speakers from the floor were not as informative as the prostrate cancer guy. Or as entertaining. They were mainly bitching about some landfill in a part of town I've never been to or even heard of in my life. But these folks were pissed. And poorly spoken for that matter. As far as the actual members of the City Council, many of them left interesting impressions - at least on this observer. Here are those impressions.
Mayor Bill Knight - looks like a cross between Yoda and Mr Magoo. Plus it appears he has no control over the proceedings he's supposedly presiding over. Knight looked perplexed, confused, baffled, and tired all at the same time. He gives me great confidence in city leadership...
T Diane Bellamy Small - her name is a little misleading. There's certainly nothing small about her. Besides her girth, 2 things about Ms Small stood out. 1) She's a fashionista. I've never seen a muumuu so colorful in my life. & 2) Ms Small talked a lot during the meeting. Most of it very ill-informed political grandstanding, by the way. For example, at one juncture Ms Small compared not having 5 or 6 early voting places available in the fall to lynching. That seemed to be a stretch, even for me.
Robbie Perkins - the kind of guy who resembles an Agnew-like crook. First, his name. What adult goes by Robbie? Don't boys give up going by Robbie when they hit like the age of 14? And his last name, Perkins - it evokes images of the shittiest late-night chain of restaurants on the face of the earth. Robbie also seemed to like to grandstand for no good reason. He repeatedly exhibited utter contempt for the mayor. To what end, I don't know. But he came across as a tool as a result.
I don't remember too much about the rest of the group that stood out. There was a guy named Zach and some ladies with pronounced southern drawls. Pretty much forgettable altogether...
I try and somewhat keep up with the goings-on of City Council through reading the Rhino. Whoever they send to sit through those meetings isn't getting paid enough. I can assure you of that.
Speaking of the Rhino, in the latest scorching issue they unveiled their bracket picks for the NCAA tourney. And boy was that a catastrophe. I don't know that they got one pick right in the entire SE region. It was almost as bad as Charlie Sheen's bracket. Sheen had Akron & Long Island in the title game...
More on the actual basketball nature of the tourney coming soon. That and I gotta say something about Barry's dalliance in Libya. WTF???
Oh, one last thing. I came across an airing of The Break Up on USA for a few minutes over the weekend. And it's totally unrealistic. Would any guy break up with Jen Aniston because she asked you to help with the dishes???
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